1 / I’ve ducked away from the cycling world for a bit,
2 / I was not really
sure what was going on and what the next step would be.
So let’s start with reason number one for taking so long ,
cycling was a huge part of my life , I spent so much time training , thinking
about training , my nutrition , planning races , pushing myself , etc. etc. ,
to have that in my eyes snatched away was gutting and the more I focused on the
fact it was going to be a quickly sorted issue and it really proving otherwise
it was not going to be the case , turned the bike from something I loved to
something I hated, watching results coming in , pbs getting smashed was just too
much, and as much as I wanted to be super happy for friends who were getting
the results it’s just made the fact I was barely able to get up off the sofa
even more painful.
Reason two was always going to be more complex, in my head
this was a blip, a few weeks taking it a tiny bit steady and all would be fine I
would be back and determined to catch up. This was probably what made the
situation being the exact opposite twice as hard to swallow.
I was at the point where walking was hard, sitting down was hard,
getting up from sitting down was incredibly painful, lying down hurt. I was
trying everything with great backing from Simon and tri force endurance and
team bottrill sponsors function jigsaw trying everything to try and recover
from the pain and not lose too much fitness on the bike, desperately holding
onto the hope this was still just a blip.
I was getting more frustrated daily clinging onto hope,
trying to push myself still against best advice, trying to manage training
sessions off my own back to prove I could still do it, which would leave me in
agony for days after, until it got to the point I just couldn’t keep doing it, I
couldn’t do anything without immense pain, I couldn’t even hold my son long
enough to feed him a bottle as the pain was too much. Frustration had turned to
anger ad it was time to stop.
The following week I disappeared into myself pretty much
cutting myself off from everything, how on earth had I gone from niggling pain
but training so well to barely being able to stand ? .
I’ve said it before but the people you surround yourself
with makes you the person you are, and no one was about to let me become a 20
stone guy sat on the sofa banging on about the glory days.
Simon had a plan, this guy is so full of positivity I was
willing to try anything suggested, hours on the phone over the coming weeks was
spent trying different focused exercises that had two things in mind , 1/ stop or manage the pain , and 2/ get me
strong again. I had to be totally honest with how I felt after every exercise
and every movement , it was so hard admitting I couldn’t do the simplest of
exercises and a 3 mile commute was harder than the national 100 but honest was
needed and Simon wasn’t going to let me bullshit him either.
I had totally ditched the bike by now apart from a very
short and very easy ride into work each day (apart from one day I thought I would
put a short effort in and it left me in huge pain for about 3 days after) but
was spending more time in the gym trying new things and my focus started
turning to getting back on the weights again.
I used to go to the gym loads really hammering the weights, I
got up to just over 16 stone (I didn’t know the importance of nutrition back then
and it was a mix of muscle and way to much food) and I loved it, but as a just
over 12 stone cyclist struggling to move around I was thinking weights would be
the last thing I should be doing.
I kept it very quiet that I was slowly adding in some
weights , not being stupid and trying to be a nutter lifting big weights ,
because a/ I was probably one of the skinniest guys there , and B/ I was as
weak as anything . I wasn’t being stupid either, simple movements that didn’t put
pressure on my back, focusing on technique over weight, and I was really
enjoying it, the first time in over a month I could focus on something.
Over the next few weeks working hard with Simon the pain got
less and more manageable, I knew if I didn’t do certain things I would be less
likely to hurt myself again, we did so much work around building strength
around the injury with a vision of moving forward not just managing the pain
and never moving on. I was still sneaking in weights sessions , reading up on
exercises that wouldn’t put added strain on my body, I was finding a new focus
, getting that determination back , I could go a few days without any issues at
all , it was time to put an effort in on the bike , nothing heavy just a toe
dip in the water. I kept this to myself, I was waiting till I felt ready, I had
no pressure from anyone to get back on the bike, but I was more worried about
them telling me not to try it (thank god they talked me out of a planned 240
mile ride that I was adamant I would still do over two days the day after we
found out the extent of the back damage). So off I went, really steady ride that
I was just going to get into the drops on the road bike and put abit of power
down. I can still feel now the feeling of tingling running right up my back and
the feeling my back was on fire getting tighter and tighter and fighting back
at every pedal stroke, I was doing 260w when my normal tt power was 370w and it
was unbareable.i skidded to a halt screaming to myself in anger, my head had
finally told my body that enough was enough. I felt like I had failed , I had
let so many people down , good people who had put so much into me , how on
earth could I face them and say I couldn’t do it? I spent the next few day sure
everyone would be pissed off with me and tell me to get on with it and sort
myself out, this couldn’t of been further from the truth, everyone gave me
genuine honest support, positive words and encouragement, I had tried
everything , pushed myself so hard and they understood how hard it all was ,
and I will always be hugely grateful to matt and Kate and everyone at team
bottrill , rich from jersey pocket and Simon and billy h from tri force
endurance for the continued support and encouragement. It’s very rare these
days to find genuine people who are not just worried about their own interest
so for that I will always be grateful.
My focus now was the gym, I wanted to get strong again this
time armed with more knowledge and a view it wasn’t just about being a beef
head lifting big weights, I didn’t want to be putting myself into surgery on my
back because I wanted to go willy waving in the gym lifting weights that I really
shouldn’t be. This was a way of focusing on something positive; there was no
way I was taking up a life on the sofa.
Knowing Simon had won awards for his personal training
skills and the fact he know my personality and focus so well there was only one
person I wanted to help me out, I bugged him to help out and thankfully he
agreed , he know what I wanted to do and why and most importantly how fragile
my back was.
We had a plan, I was my old self, focused and determined, blabbing
on about what if I do this and that and trying to leave no stone unturned.
Things where / are going great I’ve been pushing hard and
learning from the bottom getting everything right focusing on technique and
taking in every detail of my training plan . I used where / are going great as
we had a minor blip. Adding in new exercises was always going to be something
that Simon would have a tough game with, the smallest things can hit my back
very hard with no warning so it’s a minefield basically; I’ve managed
everything with no issues and nothing but positive feedback from my body which
has been awesome and such a relief. We have found my big no no exercise and I’m
convinced it’s as much me not hitting the technique perfectly as much as the movement
of the exercise, but deadlifts are my weakness and we got negative feedback
from trying them, so they are out and something else will take its place and
the sequence of finding what works and what doesn’t continues.
I’m well into my second week now on Simons plan and I’m as
focused and happy as I’ve ever been training. It’s going to be a very long slow
road going forward but I’m confident it’s going to be awesome , will I be back
on the bike only time will tell and I’m playing it completely as let’s just see
what happens.
Again I cannot thank everyone who has helped and continues
to help me along the way, I was so lucky to have that help and support and will
always be hugely grateful for the opportunities from very genuine people.
I will try and keep the blog going with updates on how the
gym training is going and progressing and where the next path takes me.
For real strength training from coaches that known what their doing and give a shit , You can find simon at www.triforceendurace.com ,
cannot recommend them all highly enough
No comments:
Post a Comment